8 Crazy Sex Myths That Are Actually the Real Deal
Before you even had sex with a real person, you probably heard some crazy stories about sex from your siblings or friends. Perhaps, you heard of stories about a man and a woman having sex then suddenly, the woman’s vagina “clenched” and made it impossible for the penis to withdraw. You also heard of stories about people making out with trees, animals and even construction tools.
Being the logical and rational one in the family, you figured these stories are meant to make you not want sex. Since you now know better, you’ve decided not to listen to your elders and let your libido take over your system.
Unfortunately, some of those crazy sex stories are true. No, they are not just for scaring you.
Sorry to break it to you, guys. Here are eight crazy myths you probably heard on the school bus and in the school hallways that are actually true.
1. A Wrong Landing Could Break Your Penis. You Could Even Hear It Snap
You’ve seen it in porn countless times. The woman is bouncing violently while she is on top. Then you start to wonder, what could happen to the dude’s member if she lands on the wrong side? A boner does not literally mean you have a bone inside it, which explains why it is hard.
However, there are two cylinders of tissues, which are responsible for keeping your man up. Believe it or not, wrong landing could “break” your mini me. Worse than that, you could even hear the sound of it snapping.
This is not meant to scare you. Your love stick is still brittle, which is why it is not recommended to turn yourself into an acrobat and do crazy, awkward positions in bed. Just in case you heard a cracking sound down south, make sure to have it checked immediately.
2. If Your Girlfriend Is Allergic To Something, Make Sure You Won’t Eat It Before You Have Sex. Otherwise, This Could Cause Her Face To Swell Up
You might say, “How in the world could giving a blowjob result to an allergic reaction? It’s not like my penis ate it too.” Unfortunately, there is such a thing called semen allergy and the effects are bad.
How does this work?
Let’s say your ladylove is addicted to peanuts. Recent studies show that if you ate peanuts before you do nasty things in bed, what you ate could affect your semen. As soon as she gives you a head, don’t be surprised to see her face swell.
Yes, it is possible that semen could trigger food allergies. Unfortunately, taking a shower and brushing your teeth won’t wash away the peanuts, or whatever food she is allergic to. If you really care about your girl, stay away from food she is allergic to every time you plan a steamy session.
3. You Could Get Stuck Inside Her. And If You Tried To Pull Away, Then You Are In Big Trouble
Somewhere in the world of myths and urban legends, there is a condition called penis captivus. It is a rarely documented but not unknown circumstance where a guy’s junk is stuck inside the woman’s package.
To make things worse, you can’t easily get it out because the woman’s vagina is too tight and could affect the future of your mini-me. Forcing it out won’t do you good as well.In other words, it’s like you two are conjoined twins, but joined at the genitals.
Experts say it’s the woman’s fault. Her area down there decided she’s not in the mood for some action. Instead of refusing to get wet, her nether region clenched and turn her vagina into a finger trap. If that’s not enough to convince you, then you should know that this happens to dogs, too. Fine, humans and dogs are not the same, but at least you get the picture.
4. Never, Ever Give Hickeys. Hickeys Could Cause Stroke And Paralysis
A love bite, popularly known as hickey, is a situation where you put your mouth on your partner’s neck, suck it hard and leave a mark that could stay in there for a few days.It could be a sign of affection for many. Believe it or not, this could lead to unwanted side effects.
Take the case of a woman from New Zealand. One day, her left arm suddenly stopped functioning well. Since she needed her arm so bad, she went to the emergency room and the doctors gave her blood thinners. It turns out that she suffered from stroke, although no one knew what caused it.
Thankfully, one of the doctors was paying close attention to her body; he noticed a bruise on her neck, which is next to a major artery. When asked, she told them it was a hickey. Unfortunately for her, her man hickeyed her so hard on the area, it bruised a major artery and caused potential paralysis.
The next time you decide to give a hickey to your girl, think again.
5. Don’t Even Dare Cheating On Your Spouse. You Could Die
Since time immemorial, people are coming up with the most awesome stories of cheating spouses and their encounter with death karma.You have to give credit to the society’s creativity to discourage cheating and infidelity. But if you come to your senses, there is no such thing as punishment for having sex with another woman aside from your wife, is it?
Apparently, one percent of sudden deaths recorded happen when guy and girl are doing some hanky-panky in the bedroom, usually one or both of them are cheating on their significant other. Worse, the statistics show most people who die in this situation are men.
In case you want to do something naughty, it’s better to steer clear of married women. Cheating is not and will never be tolerated, no matter how hot the married woman is.
6. Sex Could Make You Blind
How many times have you heard this myth? Even before the day your grandfather’s grandfather was born, this “Sex could make you blind” has been there.You already know that having some alone time with your man down there won’t affect your vision. The question now is could having sex make you blind?
The answer is kind of. This happens when sex is so good, as if your juices go straight to your eyes and make you lose your vision. This condition is what doctors call a vascular disturbance.
When you climax, a small chunk of fatty plaque can break off from your carotid artery and go to the retinal artery of the eye. This maylimitthe blood supply to your eye, which explains why you lose your vision.
Don’t worry. This will only last for a few minutes. It only affects one eye, so you could still see.There are also stories about an old man who always went blind every time he had sex with his wife.
There is also a story about a Danish dude who always went blind with one eye every time he had an orgasm, and a woman from Texas who would also lose her vision 30 minutes after sex.
Still, don’t take this lightly. This could be a sign of heart disease and atherosclerosis, which is not a good thing.
7. For Problems Reaching Climax, Take An Orgasm Pill. It Will Give You An Instant Orgasm Without Foreplay Or Masturbation
Have you heard of clomipramine? It is an antidepressant pill, which has been around since the 60’s. What are the side effects, you may ask.
Aside from getting rid of your depression, this drug is known for being an orgasm drug. It could make you orgasm in an instant, without having to go through foreplay, a blowjob and even penetration itself. Unfortunately, you have to deal with side effects such as nausea, weight gain and even impotence.
Just in case you need some help down there, you know what to do. Though seriously, where is the fun in that?
8. Guys, Watch Out And Don’t Go Near The Pool Filter. It Could Suck Your Man In And It Would Be The Most Painful Feeling On The Planet
Admit it. You love playing near the pool’s filter. While playing in there, some kid from another family told you to be careful because it might suck your dong. You didn’t pay attention, since how could that even be possible.
It turns out it’s true.
One day in Lakeland, Florida, police officers got a call from a motel clerk asking for help. One of their clients was stuck in the pool filter.
Unfortunately, shutting off the pump won’t help. No thanks to the suction filter, the man’s dong was swelling really bad and taking it out is not as easy as it seems.
Thankfully, paramedics came in, though by the time they got there, a huge number of people were in the pool area to check out what happened.
What do all these sex myths, which turned out to be true really mean? No one can stop you from having sex anytime you want. However, you have to be responsible for your actions.
These myths are not meant to make you stop wanting sex. They only serve as a reminder to be extra careful with your actions to make sure that sex will serve its purpose.